


Hellish

by Sidney Pierced (sidneypierced)



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Bartender Anya, Crossover, F/F, I'm Sorry, Police, chloe decker x clarke griffin, clexa's Lucifer AU, forensics Raven Reyes, i don't know what descended on me to write this, lucifer x lexa
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-28
Updated: 2016-10-14
Packaged: 2018-08-18 10:05:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,872
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8158295
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sidneypierced/pseuds/Sidney%20Pierced
Summary: During her extended vacations from Hell, Lexa has to deal with losing Costia after she got shot outside her club. Investigating Costia's murder is Detective Clarke Griffin and she is disturbingly unaffected by her hellish charms, despite that Lexa will do everything to help her catch Costia's murderer.





	1. Queen of Pain

**Author's Note:**

> Listen up guys, I've got myself into Lucifer and then I had an idea, the Lucifer - Clexa Crossover! The fanfic NOBODY asked about is here and is probably just going to be a one shot. This comes from the universal tv show rule that "if you want to make it better, you should make it gayer". I love the original characters Chloe and Lucifer so much that for a show so devoid of gayness it has most certainly got me hooked. I might have to change cannon Lexa a bit and insert some sense of humour in her, the devil has to be a smartass. So sit back, relax and enjoy the nonsense.
> 
> ps: I'd like to appologize Neil Gaiman for the appropriation and ruining of his version of Lucifer

"COSTIA" Lexa yells from the top of the stairs at her club, there's dancers in all pillars and they help the atmosphere. When she bought this place she wanted it to be inferno chic, Lexa thinks she managed it without using even a dash of red in the decor.  
A beautiful woman looks up in her direction, she's beautiful. In an expensive looking red dress she was impossible to ignore, her wonderful Afro hair, her poise, her charisma and her septum piercing made all the heads turn around.  
"I heard you go by Lexa now." She's smiling and if there's someone capable of drawing a smile in Lexa is Costia. "Long time, no see." She will not come up the stairs, Lexa always goes to her no matter what situation.  
"Yes, you know Lucifer doesn't really go down well with mortals in this country." She reaches in the bar for two flutes of champagne. "I assume you still have this."  
"Well you know me, I will not lower my standards." Costia smiles warmly and they sit in a booth at the further end of the club.

"So what brings you here, it's been what? Three years?"  
"Well, I was alone tonight and I realized I never really said thanks."  
"Oh Costia, you know that if I really wanted to even our situation, I'd find you."  
"You never called." There's an hint of sadness in her voice and Lexa hates it. Costia was always one of her favorite, doing her a favour was a pleasure. Usually her whole favor scheme works just as it does between humans she gives something they have no other way - or don't really want to go there - to attain and in return she basically owns them. It's always about power but not with Costia, she always had a weak spot for the ebony beauty in front of her.  
"You know why, I couldn't share you with anyone else let alone with the world." Lexa smirks and takes a sip from her drink. Then more seriously while she looks away as if she was seizing and expelling invisible crumbs off her blazer. "I had to let you go, I was scared my father would mess with you too."  
"He's still pissed about the extended vacation?" Costia moves closer to Lexa and puts her hand on the brunette's thigh.  
Lexa exhales loudly and leans her hair on Costia's shoulder. "You have no idea. The old man won't let it go. You'd think someone with so much to do would care less about what I do with my life. Look at the mess this world is..."  
"Oh baby, you know you were always His favorite..." Costia kisses her cheek. "And who could blame him?"  
At the distance, Anya is watching the scene from the bar and judging. When will Lexa learn that being that close to mortals can only get them in trouble. She thought Lexa had listened to her the first time Costia was around but that bitch seemed to find her way back to Lexa like they were some sort of karmic lovers. She couldn't wait for this century to be over and this Costia person to be six feet under. That's the only good thing about mortals, their short expiration date. This was never an issue with old Lucifer, in her kingdom she could torture and punish the guilty and never have to worry about Lucif---Lexa, goddamn ridiculous name she choose, about Lexa's safety. Now she was stuck to a fucking club, serving drinks and making sure Lexa didn't piss off anyone too much otherwise heaven would fall on their heads.  
"Lately, I've been feeling rather sad Lexa."  
"I know, I've read it in the papers...what's going on?" The tabloids have been over and over how Costia was depressed or under some sort of drug addiction. Which was stupid, Costia would never touch anything addictive, she was too much of a control freak. So Lexa dismissed it as gossip as usual.  
"No seriously, I've been thinking..."  
"You mortals always think too much of stuff you shouldn't and not nearly enough of stuff you should." Lexa said asking Anya for another to cups only to see her roll her eyes as hard as she could. That must have hurt.  
"Like when making deals with the Princess of hell?"  
"Touché."  
"I'm just being silly, I really should go."  
"No, please, stay. It's so nice to see you Costia, you have no idea. Please, I won't mock you, tell me what's wrong."  
"You know my last album?" Costia was a role model, activist, singer with a very acute political view that could rub off the wrong way in a lot of people. Particularly, lobbyists. We know what happens to people who threaten the way corporations make their cents.  
"They call it "incendiary" I believe in Rolling Stone magazine." Of course Lexa, heard it, she watch, read, bought anything Costia the exact minute it came out. It drove Anya nuts.  
"Well, what if I actually messed up with the wrong people? I have this impending doom feeling." She says has Lexa helps her put on her jacket.  
"You are bff with The Devil, Costia. Just snap your fingers and I'll go running faster than Usain Bolt." She hugged Costia tight as they waited for her driver to meet them.  
"Promise?"  
"Are you doubting Lucifer's word?" Lexa smiled and leaned in for a kiss, one she had longed for and she allowed herself to enjoy it.  
"Why don't we do that more often?" Costia asks her with her eyes still close when she pulls away.  
"Because it would mean I'd have to take you back with me to hell once my vacay is over."  
"I wouldn't mind being Princess of the damned."  
"You are far too lovely for that." Lexa says and takes a step back as a black car approaches. "However we'll always play your album for the corrupt."  
Costia smiled to her and Lexa couldn't wonder really why was she denying herself such pleasure. Her answer came in the form of bullets delivered through the black cars window and hitting Costia several times. She saw her body hit the floor before realising she was hit herself and rushing to the body on the floor.  
This was why, humans die. Mortals. They are mortals. Costia wasn't breathing and her blood was getting all over her suit as she hugged her one last time.

"Miss Morningstar. Can I ask you some questions?"  
Lexa heard a voice and felt the need to wipe the wetness of her face. Tears. She was crying, Anya will never stop teasing her about that. Lucifer, the demon who cried. How distasteful.  
"Yes, of course." She focused now her attention on the person in front of her.  
"I'm detective Clarke Griffin. Miss Morningstar I was informed you were with the victim during the shooting, is that correct?" The woman was serious, very attractive, this was Los Angeles after all. Even the cops look like they could be in the cover of Vogue.  
"Yes, yes. Costia was a friend of mine." For the lack of a better term she would use friend to describe their relationship. "She owed me a favor" would be far to vacant to express what they were to each other.  
"And, I'm sorry to ask you this, did you notice anything particular about the shooter? Something that can give us any additional information."  
"It came in a black car, we thought it was her chauffeur, he rolled the window and he had an expensive watch."  
"What type of watch?" Detective Griffin was piercing her with her blue eyes and Lexa found them slightly intimidating because she was the princess of darkness it should be the other way around.  
"I don't really know but I'll recognize it if I see it again."  
"Thank you so much, you have been very helpful. Can you just state your full name and profession, I don't want to bother you but I really have to write the report." Clarke shrugs.  
"Yes, of course. I'm Lucifer, Lexa, Morning star. I'm the owner of the club Lux." She sees Clarke raise her eyebrow to her whole name. She makes a mental note to use it as an example to make Anya stop messing her about her new name.  
"Thank you, again, we'll be in touch Miss Morningstar." Clarke extends a hand for Lexa to shake.  
"Detective, please. If there's anything I can do to help you get who did this, please do tell. I'd like the guilty for this hideous crime to be punished."  
"LAPD will do everything in their power, I promise you we'll find who did it." They're hands were still locked.  
"Tell me, Detective Clarke Griffin what is it that you most desire in this world?" Lexa wanted to know so she could offer a deal to the good detective. She wanted to punish who ever did this with all the options on her hellish menu. Nothing better than knowing what she could trade with, that's her real skill in this world, humans ALWAYS told her what they wanted.  
"To...catch who did this... Miss Morningstar, you are hurting my hand." Clarke said furrowing her browns and gesturing with her head to their joined hands. What do you mean? It's not working on her???  
"I'm sorry. I'm quite disturbed, it's been a long night." Lexa dumbfounded let's go of Clarke's hand.  
"Go get some rest, Luc-Lexa. You might look like you need it." Clarke looks freaked out and not for good reasons, Lexa looks in the mirror of a car to see if her inner demon self is showing and it's not. So does that mean she...Clarke is imune to her? Nonsense. It was probably the long night, she'll try again tomorrow.

"You finished with Morningstar?" Raven asks her as she finishes doing the first evaluation of the body on the floor. CSI Raven Reyes as Clarke calls her when she wants to get on her nerves.  
"What a wierdo!" She crouches next to Raven pretending to see anything, Raven was always the one for forensics no wonder she was the best in the county.  
"A hot looking wierdo, should be illegal for a woman to look that good on a suit." Raven says taking her eyes of the corpse and staring at Lexa who was scratching her head and adjusting her hair in the mirror.  
"I'm sure she is well aware of that."  
"What? Like you wouldn't tap that?" Raven huffs resuming her examination.  
"She introduced herself as Lucifer Morningstar. What a douche?"  
"As in Satan, ruler of all that is evil?"  
"Yes, but she'll answer to Lexa as well."  
"What? No sympathy for the devil, Clarke Griffin. You are pretty pathetic yourself!"  
"PATHETIC?"  
"Yes, we both are actually. There's no bigger proof that our social lives are in ruins is that we need a case to come to Lux!"  
"She would not let go of my hand!!" Clarke said standing up.  
"Maybe she liked what she saw. I'm done here." Raven winks at her and shouts to the guys by the ambulance. "You can take her to the morgue, boys!"  
"Besides she asked me what I most desired, she doesn't even know me, I thought it was really unprofessional." Clarke thinks she is making a real good point.  
"That, or she really IS the devil."  
"Oh c'mon, not you too, Raven. Let's get out of here."


	2. Breezeblocks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa seeks an old enemy to try and find out who got Costia.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading and for your kind words. I tried to write another chapter I hope it is to your liking. I'm happy there's more people who think this is a pleasant idea, I hope I can do it justice.

On the next morning, Lexa goes to the club earlier than usual. The staff is still cleaning the mess from last night's party and she is sitting on the piano playing The Police's King of Pain.  
"Someone is brooding." Anya says sitting next to her on the piano bench, putting down a skull shaped liquor bottle and pouring the content into two cups.  
"Isn't a little early for this?" Lexa asks even though she is already taking the cup to her lips.  
"Not if you consider the fact that none of us got any sleep last night, unlike you I was up for the right reasons." Anya smirks and Lexa does an appalled expression.  
"I cannot believe I am the one who is actually blamed for people's sins!!"  
"You know bad rep is hard to clean."

They were still finishing their drink, when the blonde detective enters the club with her badge flashing to the staff. She walks down the stairs towards them and Lexa can't help letting out a sight, she could swear she has seen her somewhere.  
"Isn't it a bit to early to be having that?" Detective Clarke points to the bottle.  
"Well only for people who actually had any sleep." Lexa said mimicking Anya's retort making a mental note to thank her. Anya is rolling her eyes to their banter and mumbles something about cleaning the bar. Clarke follows her leave and Lexa could swear she was staring at her bartender's butt. So she does have libido, it makes it even more strange that she didn't react to Lucifer herself.

"What can I do to help you, Detective Griffin?" Lexa asks a little annoyed at the lack of attention.  
"The car and the shooter were found on a ditch, in the early hours of this morning." Clarke starts.  
"Yes, I know, I had a little chat with the bugger." Lexa fills another cup. "Would you like some, Detective?" She smirks wondering if the ambiguity of the question gets the good detective smiling. It does not, she gets an exasperated huff and a no thank you. Rejection hurts Lexa, specially because it's such an unfamiliar territory.  
"So you have been with the shooter and managed to talk to him?" Clarke doubts since the time of death was estimated right after the shooting and right after the shooting Lexa was with her.  
"He wasn't exactly alive when I found him, he was dead but he hadn't cross the threshold yet."  
"The threshold..." uh oh Clarke thinks, again with the underworld shenanigans.  
"Yes, before that lady comes to tell them to follow the light like that Jennifer Love-Hewitt tv show." Clarke searches Lexa for a break in character and she sees nothing. This woman is positively delusional. "He was, however, completely unuseful. He just said he did it for the money and he just pulled the trigger. So it wasn't some passionate shooting or whatever stupid things humans do and blame love for it."  
"I can see that you like to play cop, Miss Morningstar?" Clarke can't disguise her annoyance, what was this girl's problem??  
"I like to play in general, but I will oblige to a cop fantasy if that gets you going!" Lexa crosses her legs and thinks this is going well until Clarke's face gets ridiculously close to hers and what comes out sounds more as a growl.  
"Miss Morningstar, I will advise you to keep those remarks to yourself and stick to answering my questions."  
"I'm sorry, Detective but there's something oddly familiar about you, have we met?" For someone to be so opposed to her charms Lexa wonders if they've had sex and if it was during that dark phase where she was dreadful in bed. She had just lost her wings, it was a very disturbing time, ok?  
"We haven't." Clarke says curtly. "What was your relationship with Costia?"  
"We were...friends. She started playing her first gigs here, she was good so I gave her a hand in the beginning of the career."  
Finally we are getting somewhere, Clarke thinks as a somber look washes over Lexa's face, she cares about the victim that is sure. She thought she would be happy that stupid smirk was gone from Lexa's face but for some unknown reason she is not. It is a lovely face, specially when it's not making moves at her.  
"And do you know anyone who can hold a grudge on her?"  
"Well, she bothered a lot of people. She was very true to her believes and she fought for what she thought was right. Nobody however must be more pissed at her than Nia."  
"Nia?"  
"Nia, the Ice Queen, her producer. Costia left her at the altar, bless her heart, I introduced them and they dated for a while. Nia helped her produce her album and Costia made her a very rich woman. However, she would only rest if she had all of Costia. To be completely honest, I hated her but I wouldn't dare interfere without C's permission so I let her be. You can imagine how much I regret it now." Lexa wouldn't lift her eyes from her glass while talking.  
"Miss Morningstar, we were informed that Costia had a drug abuse problem and some cocaine bags were found in her pocket. The hitman might be from some drug cartel she owed money to..."  
"Nonsense, Costia was clean. I'm sure of it."  
"You said you hadn't seen her in a while..."  
"But I know her...knew her"Lexa got up and stood inches away from Clarke's face but she will not be intimidated.  
"Miss Morningstar... How is it possible that Costia got a shower of bullets right next to you and you managed not to get hurt?" Clarke didn't bulge and boldly asked the question that had been driving her crazy all night.  
Lexa smiles and let's down of her guard leaning body on the piano. "I'm immortal, detective have you been listening to me at all?"  
"Yeah right, we'll be in touch, Miss Morningstar."  
"Please call me Lexa." Lexa extends her hand and this time Clarke doesn't take her, she does however smirk just before turning around and living the club.

"Is that your new pet, Luce?" Anya asks as she watches the scene. "You have drool coming down the corner of your mouth."  
"I must certainly have not, I'm just intrigued." Lexa says reflectively wiping her lips with her thumb. "She's not phased by me, Anya, you must admit it's odd."  
"You were always a sucker for pretty blondes. I'd hate to tell you this but she is trouble, Lucifer, we really should get back home." Anya is serious now and in the past she always took Anya's wise words into consideration but no way in hell (ahah pun intended) she was going home anytime soon let alone now.  
"I'm afraid that will have to wait."

The church is used and it's beautiful even though this isn't a religious event. The civil wedding between Nia and some poor unknown stranger, nothing will make Lexa happier than ruining it.  
She opens the door and feels the whole of the Ice nation, her record label, minions staring at her, Nia is trashy enough to make all her employees to be present to fill the house. No one better than Lexa knows if there were only people who actually liked her in this place she would be alone. Not even the bride loves her and Lexa is leaving that to be the cherry on top of her cake today.  
"WELL WELL!" Lexa enters the venue mimicking Maleficent's words and it's not a random choice of dialogue. She is here to ruin a party and she is almost sorry that she doesn't have the horns humans insist on portraying her with. She'll never get that, or the association with goats for that matter.  
"What the hell are you doing here?"  
"Hello again Nia, don't you think it's a little cold hearted of you to hold your wedding on the day following the death of your former love of your life?"  
"Lexa, you know well enough how much Costia humiliated me. To be completely honest, I couldn't care less about the bitch. I'd say I rebounded very well." She gestures rudely to the girl beside her and Lexa feels her insides turn.  
"Say another word and I'll splatter your internal organs on your wife to be's pretty white dress. Tell me all you know." Lexa's eyes go red and she is raising Nia from the ground grabbing her neck.  
"Hey, Hey, I'm joking, I'm joking besides you should go and ask Murphy about her, she was dating him. I think he goes by as Too Vile and has a house on Mullholland."  
"Thank you for that precious piece of information, Ice queen." Lexa says and she turns to the girl next to them. She might let Nia go this time but not without having her fun.  
"Hello there, I don't think we've been introduced, I'm Lexa Morningstar." Lexa smiles charmingly and she could see the girls knees get weak. "Can you tell me, darling.."  
"Annie, my name is Annie." She looks like she might need a fan to keep the heat out of her.  
"Darling Annie, tell me, what do you desire most in the world?"  
"I really don't want to sleep with her tonight, or ever."  
The whole crowd flinches and a uh can be heard before a sepulchral silence takes over the place.  
"WELL, my work here is done!" Lexa claps and begins walking backwards towards the door. "Good luck to you crazy kids and Nia I suggest you grab this one before you are left again alone in there. See you soon."

Lexa's next stop is Murphy's lair. Too Vile sounds like the most unfortunate name but the house is nice.  
The butler opens the door and she manages to crash the party under the false pretense of having drugs to Too Vile.  
"CAN SOMEONE PLEASE TURN OUT THIS RIDICULOUS MUSIC?!" The dj is playing some dubstep track and there was nothing Lexa hated more than dubstep.  
"What you don't like dubstep?" A guy in the corner asked and looking into her phone Lexa compares her google image search with the man in front of her.  
"You are the unfortunate Too Vile?"  
"Yes, yes I am and you are not a guest to my party, you should leave." A bunch of guys get up and clutch their guns. How badass. Ridiculous humans.  
"You should not waste your munitions, I am immortal. You'll thank me later. I'm here to ask you about Costia."  
"Don't you see the news?? The bitch is dead." Murphy says and before he realizes it he is standing outside of balcony with Lexa grabbing him by the fake chain around his neck. "Hey, hey, hey. I liked her ok, she was one of the good ones but she had a lot of ideas. That stupid Ice Queen however she wanted to end her, she was going to stir a lot of buzz with her next album and she asked me to produce her ok? She knew I would not censure her."  
Lexa's eyes were red again. "Why didn't you say so to begin with?"  
"Because I'm scared of the Ice Bitch. I thought If I played cool she wouldn't off me too."  
"No honour among thieves huh?" Lexa's eyes were back to normal now that her rage was back in control. She brings Murphy back into the right side of the balcony.

"Lexa, what on God's name do you think you are doing?" Clarke had her gun pointed on her and the rest of the gang were cowering behind her.  
"Well I was just asking some questions to this fine gentleman." Lexa flashes her pearly whites but, boy, is Clarke pissed.  
"She was grabbing me off the balcony. That isn't legal is it?" Murphy says over Lexa's shoulder.  
"Nah, not really." Clarke answers lowering her gun, Lexa looks shocked at her.  
"But detective I made progress and you followed my lead. You got my message didn't you?"  
"Yeah about that, Miss Morningstar? How did you get my number? actually, Too Vile was the last number the shooter called so...it was kind of a no brainer."  
"Your mother gave it to me and well I got here anyway. I can help you with your investigation!" Lexa said certain she was impressing the detective. Clarke circled her and grabbed one hand behind her back followed by the other.  
"I'm taking you to custody."  
"Your mother gave your phone number willingly ok? Why am I the one being arrested?"  
"Thanks man, the LAPD is an institution Too Vile always supports." Murphy says feeling vindicted.  
"SHUT UP!" Both Lexa and Clarke shout and leave the house.

Clarke takes the cuffs off Lexa and the latter fakes hurt around her wrists.  
"Was that really necessary, Clarke?"  
"It's Detective Griffin and you are interfering with my investigation, I really should get you into to custody."  
"I am certainly not. I have information that can be helpful to you, I can help you. Besides my unique set of skills will be exactly what you need to fix this. " Lexa stares deep into Clarke's eyes. "Tell me detective, what is it that you most desire in the world?"  
"Again with that question?" Clarke looks at her. "That's your biggest trick, that's your skill."  
Lexa looks embarrassed. "It usually works ok?"  
Clarke decides to indulge the crazy. "Can you read minds at least?"  
"NO, I cannot read minds I'm not a fucking Jedi."  
"Ok so you can get out of people what their biggest sins are?"  
"No, I can get what they most desire in the world."  
"Oh I get it. The name, Lucifer Morningstar, is like your super hero alias and desires are your super powers?" Clarke crosses her arms and raises her eyebrows at Lexa.  
"YES, that's what I've been trying to tell you detective. Let me try again, what is your most secret desire, Clarke?" Lexa looks deeply into Clarke's eyes again.  
"Oh you know, I've always wanted to be a cop like my mommy and help people and lock the bad guys away..." Clarke looks innocent, candid, she turns around Lexa positioning her next to the open back door of the car. "..and be taken seriously when I tell you to get in the car and stop messing with the case." And she closes the door after pushing Lexa inside leaving the brunette locked in.  
She enters the car and stares at Lexa who puts her head between the two front sits staring at her through the review mirror. "Are YOU some sort of jedi?" She asks seriously and it gets Clarke laughing out loud.


	3. Trip Down Memory Lane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke and Lexa meet Costia's Shrink

"Okay, Lucy pants, spell it out. What is it that you know?"  
"Well, Costia went to a therapist maybe she told her something we might consider useful" Lexa says, studying detective Griffin's face as she drives. That's it! She knows why she remembers her.  
"That's actually pretty good..." Clarke concedes. "Do you have an address?"  
"I'm looking for it." Lexa says searching the phone she managed to steal in Too Vile's house, before crashing his party she entered his room and found Costia's second cellphone. The public one she used to call it, it belonged to Nia's era in her life, the only doctor that made sense in Costia's life was a therapist and the name was Doctor Octavia Blake. Funny name but who was she to judge. "Call this number and ask if Eleanor Rigby was her client."  
"Alright..." Clarke did as she was told, which was a first in her police career, and was surprised to know Lexa was actually right, Doctor Blake would see them over lunch, it was a real breakthrough. "Well done." She stops so they can get some coffee and Lucifer has the most ridiculous smirk on her face. "What?"  
"I know it. I know why you are so familiar." Lexa is positively bouncing in her seat. Clarke can't help but to roll her eyes.  
"So what, you've seen my boobs, big deal."  
"But it's a fantastic b series movie. You were phenomenal. Is that what you really wanted to be? An actress."  
"Yes, my dad was an actor. I'm glad that he died before he could see that stupid film."  
"But, other than the sex thing, it's a pretty rad movie."  
"It's about people getting funky on a space ship, it was hardly catching the Academy's attention, besides it's so badly written."  
"Yeah, I mean who would believe it that Captain Taylor would stay with Captain Morley when she could live on earth with the grounder General." Clarke founds it refreshing that Lexa is actually speaking of the movie and not making sexual jokes about it.  
"I mean, me and that actress that played General Carey had amazing chemistry..." Lexa catches something on Griffin's face could swear she was a little bitter about it, how did she wish she could read minds, somehow.  
"Yes. Well, at least, your boobs looked amazing. You should be proud of it even if it was the worst piece ever written in the history of cinema."  
"Thank you, I guess." Clarke offers. Lexa cocks her head like a confused puppy. " What?"  
"You are a strange human, detective. You are immune to me, you are immune to compliments, are you immune to the joys of life?"  
"Are you serious?" Just when she was actually letting her guard down in front of this idiot.  
"Yes, Detective, I swear on my father's...not grave... eternal bliss or whatever!" Lexa says and she puts her hand on top of Clarke's.  
"Well, I'm not immune to..." Clarke starts trying to remember the exact words,.  
"...the joys of life"  
"...the joys of life. I have a daughter, Trixie, she's all the joy I need. Now we have to go or we'll be late to the shrink appointment."  
"Oh a spawn. Of course you would." Lexa sighs.  
"Are you always this weird?" Clarke says as she puts her sunglasses on and lets Lexa into her front seat.

"Doctor Blake, when was your last appointment you had with Costia?" Clarke is sitting on the couch at the doctor's office. Doctor Blake is beautiful and fierce, she wouldn't feel comfortable sharing her darkest desires to her but she had a competent air to her, maybe she was good and assertive. Maybe that was all some people needed.  
"Last week. she was depressed and we were helping her work things out. She had no drug abuse or whatever nonsense the press is telling you." Octavia says looking in a pile of files for Costia's reports.  
"And did she mentioned me, doctor?" Lexa asked making Clarke snap her head to her. What the hell was she thinking?  
Octavia stopped what she was doing and looked dead in Lexa's eyes. "What name did you say?"  
"Lucifer Morningstar, or just Lexa." She just leaned back on the couch and stared at the doctor.  
"oh....Oooooh. You!" Octavia said and sat down in front of them with her eyes trained on Lexa.  
"Yes?" Clarke is looking at both of them, clueless.  
"You helped her start, you made everything possible for her. She was poor, coming from a disrupted family, you introduced her to that Nia person. She wanted you, she never got over you, not only because you were magical in bed but also because she said she was sure you were in love with her. She felt the same, I think you should know that, she believed you thought it was impossible"  
"Yes, it seemed like it at the time." "You silly celestial being, she loved you dearly." Octavia laughed in her high. "She never got how you pushed her away." Lexa was a little constricted like she was on a verge of a panic attack, she felt Clarke nudge her and for a second she left Blake's eyes, she met unguarded blue eyes and it was a nice change.  
"Oh...almost enough to make me envy her." Octavia is ignoring Griffin completely and she's feeling slightly offended.  
"So tell me, good doctor, what is it that you desire most in the world?" Lexa asks, smirking, looking into her eyes.  
"Besides you?" It's almost as if the Octavia can't control herself. Clarke is squirming in her seat and clearing her voice.  
"aham." She's elbowing Lexa in her side.  
"Yes, besides me"  
"Well, I want to be the best therapist in the world..." Octavia starts.  
"Yes..." Lexa says leaning towards her.  
"But I really want to break patient confidenciality agreement." Octavia blurts out.  
"Please darling, we are all ears..." Lexa is positively flirting now.  
"Costia was getting threats from Nia, I think she off'd her." OCtavia says and immediately Lexa lets go of her gaze and stares at Clarke.  
"I told you I could help." Clarke was dumbfounded staring at lexa trying to find out if she could feel whatever she was doing to get Octavia talking. Nothing, she felt nothing, those are just very beautiful green eyes to be honest.  
"Hmmm" Doctor Blake is blushing and trying to find a way of getting away of them. They decided to help her out.  
"Thank you Doctor Blake, I think we'll see each other very soon." Lucifer gets up and grabs her hands. "Are you free, on thursday late afternoon?"  
"I'll have to check with the secretary, can you call and get back in that?" Octavia asks and gives her a card with her numbers.  
"We'll be in touch." Clarke says feeling like a sidekick in her own investigation but Lexa was useful she would wait until they get in the car to ask for her explanations.

"Does everybody want to get into your pants???" Clarke says as soon as they hit the sidewalk.  
"That's what I've been trying to tell you, detective, you fascinate me!"  
"That was gross."  
"That was useful." Lexa says. "Why is it bothering you so much?"  
"Because you are nothing special!" Clarke says and she's lying.  
"That's not it, you find me attractive detective, you might be immune but you know, I'm divine."  
"You are ok looking but that doctor is like a Victoria secret model, she was positively drooling over you. I felt like I was third wheeling on a date and I DO NOT thirdwheel."  
"Are you jealous you are not the center of attention?"  
"No."  
"Did you prefer if they pine over you, detective? I can also arrange that."  
"Miss Morningstar!" Clarke stops in the middle of the street staring at her, fully wanting to yell all her frustrations into Lexa, she does not need help on that field either.  
"Yes, Detective Griffin." They are having a western stand off of sorts and Lucifer really can't cope with the fact that she can't get to Griffin.  
"It's not that they pine over you and not me, it's unethical!!"  
"But it gets stuff done, detective."  
"But at what cost, Lexa?! you got a date with her!"  
"Darling, I'm getting a session of therapy, I have daddy issues. Isn't that what everybody does in LA? Get therapy?" Lexa steps closer to her.  
"It's detective Griffin for you." Clarke pretends that " darling" doesn't get to her.  
"I'm sorry. Detective Griffin, we have a murder to catch. That woman was a means to an end, she might be helpful to me in other issues other than that."  
"But, Lexa..."  
"No need to get jealous, your boobs are definitely more awesome than hers, detective Griffin."  
"Oh you are disgusting, get in the car!" Clarke says, slapping Lexa and strutting until she gets in the car and furiously waits for Lexa to get in.

**Author's Note:**

> What do you think? Is this worth continuing? thank you for reading, I hope it is at best, amusing.


End file.
